Be A Family: News

By Jenny Pope
Buckner International

They keep each baby’s picture on their refrigerator like family photos on a mantle – innocent faces lined up in the order of their arrival to the home. Mark and Jacquie Craggett go through the photos and call each child by name: Raquelle, Anthony, Nathan, Desi, William, Maya, Hayden, Peanut, Brian.

“Some of these babies were only with us a for a few weeks, but we feel like they’ve always been with us,” Jacquie said.

Technically, two of them have. Nathan and William’s smiling faces stare back at Mark and Jacquie from both the refrigerator door and the armchair across the room. Only one version – the version in the chair – is much older. The two brothers, now ages 6 and 7, were adopted after being fostered by the Craggetts since they were just a few days old.

“We had always been open to adopting, but that was never something we thought about when we decided to foster,” Jacquie explained. The couple became licensed foster parents after their oldest daughter, Courtney, developed a passion for serving orphans at age 13. It didn’t take long for the family to follow suit.

“Our main priority was to protect babies and love them,” she continued. “We were open to adoption, but our goal and desire was always for the mom to get her life together and get the babies back with their family.”

But when Nathan came into their home at 4 days old, and the family had the opportunity to name him, Jacquie had a feeling things might change.

“I would get up in the middle of the night to feed him or change him and I would see his little face and wonder, ‘Maybe he’s the one.’ I bonded with him immediately,” she said.

Having been exposed to drugs and alcohol as an infant, Nathan was immediately placed into the state’s care after he was born. His mother’s rights were terminated a few months later. With no other family available to take him, the Craggetts were asked if they were interested in adopting him.

“I had been reluctant to start thinking of him as our son until we knew for sure it was a possibility,” Jacquie said. “But when we found out, it was a one second transition for me. We were ready.”

The Craggetts were in the process of adoption when they received another phone call from Child Protective Services. Nathan’s mother was trying to have an abortion.

“We sat down immediately that day, all of us, and started praying that she wouldn’t abort the child,” Jacquie remembered. A few months later, one of her daughters asked her when “Lydia” was going to be born.

“I had forgotten all about it, but they were convinced that Nathan’s birth mom was going to have a girl and her name would be Lydia,” she said. It wasn’t too long afterwards that they received another call – William had been born with drugs in his system. Child Protective Services asked if the Craggetts could take William into their home, but they were hesitant because of what the placement might imply.

“William was the first child we were taking in with the intention to adopt,” she said. “Knowing that it might not work out and we would have to say goodbye was really scary.” After a couple of weeks of prayer and discussion, they decided to trust God and take the risk. He was meant to be with them.

Jacquie took William to weekly visits with his birth mother as she went through the steps to rehabilitate herself: parenting classes, Narcotics Anonymous meetings and counseling. She followed through on her plan and after 10 months, William was placed back into her custody.

“Giving back William was one of the hardest things we ever had to do,” Kelsey, 17, said. “It was so, so, so hard.”

Unable to take another child into their home, the Craggetts spent some time grieving William’s absence and praying for his mother.

“We prayed for her to do well and for her to be a good mom to William,” Mark said. “She did everything right. She was moving in the right direction. We wanted what was best for her and William.”

Eight months after William was placed back with his birth mother, she relapsed. William was taken back in the state’s care and needed a home. This time, when the Craggetts received a phone call from CPS to take William in, they knew it would be for good.

Though both boys were exposed to drugs and alcohol and dealt with developmental and sensory issues as infants, they have been “blessed with a sharp mind.”

“We are all grateful that their issues are so minor. Our biggest issue is that we now have two boys, 10 months apart, and we’re in our 50s,” she laughed.

Having raised four tame girls, caring for wrestling boys has been a challenging change of pace. But the Craggetts relish the positive impact foster care and adoption has made in their family.

“God has really used the boys in all our lives, taking us to new places in our understanding of His sovereignty and love for us,” Jacquie said. “God has chosen to take these little boys and redeem them, the way He redeems all of us. It has really strengthened our understanding of who God is.”

“Fostering has helped our daughters to see the darker side of life and the outcomes of making poor decisions,” Mark said. “You never want to shield your children too much from problems. I know that our girls, when they go through grief in the future, they will be better equipped.

“Fostering has really knitted our family together.”

Though Jacquie admits fostering is not for everyone, she thinks everyone should understand that “serving God is. There are a lot of places to serve, but if God has called you to be a foster family, don’t be afraid. God is in control. God has a purpose. God is good.”